An Interview with David The Good
My publisher just posted a little interview at their site regarding my new book Compost Everything: The Good Guide to Extreme Composting.
Viidad: Why did you write Compost Everything?
David The Good: I suppose I should say “because I love our mother the earth” or “because I want to world to reduce, reuse and recycle” or something stupid like that, but really, it’s because I’m a cheapskate and I hate following all the rules that tell me I should throw out stuff that could be added into my gardens as fertilizer.
Viidad: Like dead bodies.
David The Good: I wish people would stop bringing that up. One or three times does not a pattern make.
Viidad: But the precedent is there…
David The Good: I will not answer any more questions along these lines. I am VFM, craven servant of the Dark Lord, serial number 0156…
Viidad: Are not! That’s my number!
David The Good: Surely The Most Evil One could not have made a mistake…!
Viidad: Never! But… well… hmm… I… whatever. Okay, weird. Back to the interview. What about this question: who should really give a flying fetid flip-flop about composting?
David The Good: Everyone.
Viidad: Why? I mean, seriously – what about people in apartments? Why should they buy your book?
David The Good: First of all, because I’m poor and buying this book helps you give back while checking your privilege. As a Teutonic-American and descendent of Roman slaves, you should want to support my work. Second of all, because the current paradigm is unlikely to last. This may appear on its surface like a fun little book about turning your trash into fertilizer; however, it’s actually a survival manual if things get ugly. If things ever get bad, you’re not going to be able to buy bags of mushroom compost or manure or fertilizer from the local garden center. They’ll be closed and the supply lines will be broken. You’ll need to grab every bit of fertility you can in order to feed your family. That means planting squash on top of buried raccoons, learning to reclaim urine and feces and compost them safely, turning fallen trees into water reservoirs of rotten wood beneath the soil because irrigation is tough, etc. This book takes you to the edges and helps you harness the cycle of nature to feed yourself without external inputs. If your apartment complex becomes a war zone, you’ll be (hopefully) making your way out to the country… and you’re going to need food. Most composting books are simply about making neat little piles in a suburban backyard during a boom time. The boom time may not continue.
Viidad: What if it does?
David The Good: Then Compost Everything will just help you save lots of money rather than saving your life.
Viidad: Is it true that your dreams are haunted by an entity known as “Dinky Worm?”
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